November 16, 2016
Have you ever had that feeling of being stuck? When you’re not entirely sure how to go about changing things, or maybe not even knowing what you want to be different?
If you’re experiencing that right now, you know what that underlying feeling of being stuck is like. It’s as though you feel lost and uncertain which direction to take or whether to take one at all.
A lot of things can bring about the feeling of being stuck…
Maybe it’s that you want to make a change or reach a goal, but that you seem to never be able to get yourself to start to take action. Maybe you feel stuck because no matter what you try, you seem to always feel like it isn’t happening or hasn’t turned out the way you wanted it to. You could even not know why you feel stuck, but have an underlying desire and need to change something, anything, but what?
In all those moments, it can feel like we’re pushing against some unseen barriers and wonder, “Why is this so hard? Why can’t I make things different?”
“The frustrating part about feeling stuck is the Pattern of Panic that can come with it…”- Jessica Ortner
Why We Get Stuck
We tend to get stuck when we think we should be something we’re not. When we think life should be different than it is.
I know for me when I’m trying to force myself to do something, when words like ”should,” ”have to,” and ”must” enter my mind, I feel like something should be happening. Instead of allowing life to unfold, I feel like I need to control and push through it.
When I relax and surrender to this quiet period in my life, things seem okay. I see that I can’t control life. I can only notice what life brings to me.
Here are some suggestions to help:
- Give UP
When you’re stuck, surrender to being stuck.
Notice the thoughts and feelings of you that say that you are stuck and that something is wrong.
If you stay completely in this moment, there is no being stuck. There is only the label of a situation—a label that you’ve invented based on what you think your life should look like.
When you notice all this going on, breathe a deep sigh of relief and let go. It doesn’t mean the feelings will go away. You may still feel anxious, but it isn’t in control of you anymore. Surrender to what comes.
The funny thing about being stuck is that it is something you have created in your thoughts and thus you have the ability to change those thoughts.
- Enjoy yourself.
There’s always something you feel drawn to do during these periods. You’re not completely stuck, not in every area of your life.
Do the work you need to and then let yourself have fun. Enjoy the things that flow and come easy to you. Take a walk, read a book, meet a friend, watch a movie.
It’s easy for me to feel guilty during this period because I feel like I’m not doing enough. But I’ve learned to see that I’m doing the best I can with what I have and I know that is always enough.
The tide will shift soon.
The same is true for you. Do what you can, but go easy on yourself.
At times when I feel truly stuck, I write.
I find to have a journal close by and take the time to write my thoughts, makes me feel better and relax with what is. Sometimes it even helps me work through what is keeping me stuck, one step at a time. I write down all my thought without hesitation or editing. I let everything come out.
The more I do this, the more I notice repeating patterns. I see how I want to change what is, and how futile it is.
The more aware I become, the more these things fall away.
When you truly become aware of what goes on inside of your head, you can start to let go because you see how you create your own suffering.
My Biggest Mistake
When we resist what is, we suffer. That’s true for anything in life.
When I try to change what is, I create my own worst enemy within.
But with time, I’ve learned to see my resistance as a sign to relax. I realize my best is all I can do, the rest is out of my hands.
Allow life to flow and feeling stuck seems to disappear. We are supported in life.
I am not separate from anything or anyone. I am this planet. I am the stars. I am you.
We just think that life should look different than it does. But the fact that life isn’t what you think it is shows that you’re wrong. (maybe change to shows that your thinking is wrong)
Let Things Be
Whether you feel stuck for a week or for a year doesn’t really matter.
It is the darkest periods of my life that have taught me the most about myself.
I’ve learned that life isn’t all about accomplishing things. Sometimes it’s about resting and letting things be.
These periods are no different than the seasons. There’s sun. There’s snow. There’s light, and there’s darkness.
Once you let it be what it is, things change because your perception changes.
But beware of making this another thing you have to do. Be kind to yourself.
It’s all good.
Peace of I